The bus to your next chapter always arrives on time I find.
The new destination for me turned out to be feminism and the first leg was a book called 'How to be a Woman' by Caitlin Moran. Absolutely brilliant read. I wish all my learning had me snorting with laughter. Really this book is as much biographical as a discussion on feminism, but whatever you want to file it under, it is really bloody funny. Tre gaffaw.
And so there is my husband on his side of the bed, quietly reading 'A Game of Thrones' and then me on my side, slapping my thigh, tears rolling down my face, stuffing the doona in my gob to muffle my laughter. It is pointless reading him the extra marvellous bits, he just shrugs and looks bemused by my beaming blotchy face.
I probably won't buy a slogan t-shirt, but Caitlin helped me want to be a feminist. Actually, can I say here that I think the word 'feminist' is a little bit wimpy, like a fairy with a lisp. Which is ironic because it's all about empowering. But anyway, it's not that I didn't have views on the state of women, it's just that i was always a bit scared of Germaine Greer and thought if I declared myself a feminist, people would think I was a hairy, angry, argumentative man-hater. And really, I think people found me a little trying already.
Anyway, Now I know more about what a feminist really is, I can pop my name on the list of endorsers and I feel a few more buttons pop off the Coat Of Learnt Restraint. Being in a bookstore is handy because now I am devouring some more related reads. Of course, I have got Germaine Greer and Simone de Beauvoir which I will read with the light on, but right now the two I am reading and which I can highly recommend are "Nice Girls Just Don't Get It' by Lois P Frankel and Carol M Frohlinger and then 'Shattered' by Rebecca Asher.
The "Nice Girls' book is just fantastic for anyone who is afraid to put her full self out there for fear of offending someone (I think we all do this in some degree) and 'Shattered' whose full title includes- 'Modern motherhood and the illusion of equality' is for any parent or parent to be. This book is very much about men too and not in a negative way. It's really about antenatal care, maternity/paternity leave, work practices and relationship dynamics as ruled by the state, employers and the parenting industry.
These books are red pills I choose to take and open my eyes further to what is around me. Once I see clearly what I am wading ankle deep in on a daily basis I am empowered to change things for the better. I am really excited for myself, and I am also proud to be a better example for my children.
I think it is a hard line to walk between fear and equality, but humour really is a great travel companion.
